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Diary of a Schizocrat

by Ridder Jameson

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1.
Honey Lemon 03:01
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I hope I'm not too late Can't wait I have no friends To give me commends But after all I just might have you My honey lemon, you make my sky blue I don't have people like I wanted Applauding me but why'd I want it? I must settle; I must settle down You're the queen, you wear the crown Tell me you'll stay with me You're busy as a bee, you see The truth will set you free Loose and free from your schizocracy Here I am going through life with a soundtrack A natural sweetness applied to a sour snack Like I never thought I can't believe everything we've got I hope I'm not too late Can't wait I have no friends To give me commends But after all I just might have you My honey lemon, you make my sky blue I don't have people like I wanted Applauding me but why'd I want it? A beautiful beat of the drum for each move I make A flight of the drone for each day awake A lyric for each thought A lemon for each drop A note for each feeling A comb for each sweetening And harmony The honey bee Ready to perk up and take my hand Only to stick me with its brand At a moment's notice Where buzzing wings will float us Day by day The tang that keeps the sweetness at bay Here I am going through life with a soundtrack A natural sweetness applied to a sour snack Like I never thought I can't believe everything we've got I hope I'm not too late Can't wait I have no friends To give me commends But after all I just might have you My honey lemon, you make my sky blue I don't have people like I wanted Applauding me but why'd I want it?
2.
Stay 04:31
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Love's like a thank you I thought you really came through Only one of the thank yous Then the last of the breakthroughs Is gone It's gone I need you to face the day I need you to stay Love's like a thank you I thought you really came through Only one of the thank yous Then the last of the breakthroughs Is gone It's gone I need you to face the day I need you to stay
3.
Seulement Les Vacances Pt.1 The Seafarer 06:03
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4.
Calamity 04:55
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Everyone who's been wronged Everyone who's bothered Everyone who's wronged Scorned by Evren's Father Transform now Become a cow Take your new life Become a knife Altogether Become a feather As family Become calamity Everyone who's been wronged Everyone who's bothered Everyone who's wronged Scorned by Evren's Father Transform now Become a cow Take your new life Become a knife Altogether Become a feather As family Become calamity
5.
The Hall of the Phrygian King 04:01
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I know what I hear will define me The shell to my ear may debrine me Inspire me and lift me up Fill the dish without spilling And lift you up, God willing Raise the spirit and also the cup How can I look a miracle in the face Think it cold, make it race And think it normal Make it Gold, name it Formal It's a beautiful thing The siren will sing That which I threw away Like a tide without moon Now there is nothing to resume So the dish ran away with the clay How can I look a miracle in the face Think it cold, make it race And think it normal Make it Gold, name it Formal Miracles aren't rare to me I'm hauled by horses of the sea And yet I don't let them help me A flavor I only found smelly The bitter taste of flesh in my mouth A favor I could do without Mixed with the sour aftertaste of misguidance The cursed gift of Poseidon's Hoping I could have such hope that I dance Setting my sights to take my advance Alas I am only dry-eyed and dry-dance Counting coins - 'Was pie-eyed for finance Even is beyond my bruised body Odd is the time I'd always get sloppy What good is the joy I had yesterday? When I adored my glorious way Is it not misguidance? As the gold of Midas For today it only led me astray Ruining my day And I am left in my loft, looking for riddance Rhythms of a rider reduced to ribbons
6.
Seulement Les Vacances Pt.2 Artemis and Isis 05:04
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7.
Death on the Nile 03:31
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Even just greeting you Dreaming and meeting you Seeing your smile Floatin' down the Nile Now I can't sleep Just until the dream is over And my body aches all over Floatin' down the Nile My stomach's turning sick Surely death will pass you over Because I miss you When I take my shot If I had one wish Said the spoon to the dish Would I wish to rip this monster out of myself? And put you back on the shelf Although I act like it, I'm not over you I'm just pretending to While we seem like people To be less than lethal I am a monster in an empty shell A missing empty shell Which I abuse For deadly ruse Had a dream last night I saw you Dreaming and meeting you You held my hand for a moment and smiled at me Floatin' down the Nile with me I thought "This is the way it should be" Didn't know I'd get trigger-happy Didn't know I could be so happy. Floatin' down the Nile The shadow of that dream weights over me Looking for your smile If I had one wish Said the spoon to the dish Would I wish to rip this monster out of myself? And put you back on the shelf Although I act like it, I'm not over you I'm just pretending to While we seem like people Be less than lethal I am a monster in an empty shell A missing empty shell Which I abuse For deadly ruse
8.
Seulement Les Vacances Pt.3 Wing and Sickle 05:15
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9.
Nightsrest 04:07
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The scars on my palms are deep Some nights I cannot sleep I cannot see beyond my own grasp But I cannot stay on task I can't even feel anything Can't reveal anything I only know to put pen to paper Buy a pound, sell an acre The scars on my palms are deep Some nights I cannot sleep I cannot see beyond my own grasp But I cannot stay on task I can't even feel anything Can't reveal anything I only know to put pen to paper Buy a pound, sell an acre Not the slightest feeling lingering But from your eyes the brightest inkling Talk to me As I drift into nightsrest
10.
The Empty Cabinet 03:22
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I lie down stripped of all I had Don't even say I worried I am so bad; I feel so bad I took off in a hurry I had to go and leave you all alone For arrogance one must atone Just as expected, I fell down to the dogs A rolling stone the wrath of the gods Like the empty cabinet where nothing belongs The stringless harp will sing no song My feelings are gone and my life is Detached from all your heart's devices In that place I'm sure something must go Our hollowness continues to show But nothing fits Should we call it quits? I couldn't leave it alone I went where the wind had blown I nibble away at my paper's edge Frantic, deranged My spark for you my heart's revenge Magic and strange I am not yet out of ink We'll be forever linked And the flame of my candle still burns A rolling stone that always returns Like the empty cabinet where nothing belongs The stringless harp will sing no song My feelings are gone and my life is Detached from all your heart's devices In that place I'm sure something must go Our hollowness continues to show But nothing fits Should we call it quits? I couldn't leave it alone I went where the wind had blown
11.
Funeral March Victory Lap 05:57
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released September 21, 2022

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Ridder Jameson Eugene, Oregon

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